Let me hear you call my name.
You know you love me, too.
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Unappreciated
Monday, December 7, 2009
 Woah , sorry for the lack of like , seriously proper updates . Gahh , been too busy catching up with family and my days was occupied by having a 'good' time with the Sanziro Family . So finally here I am , pouring out this filled life of mine with you,wonderful strangers.Well . I must say , it was a good thing to be there neither was it a bad one . I shall say , for now , i regretted being there , but a side of me am thankful for actually being there . So having to been lacking of time to spent with them , I finally braved myself and actually FORCE myself to have a good time . On Saturday , i sleptover at Ibu's place . I couldn't recall much what happened . Only that , it was actually kinda bored . Was it ? Ahhh , my mind went blank . Yazin and A slept there too . And I must say , A , you are a great friend . And I myself , choose it to remain as it is . And so well , on that day , i texted with Kin , Aimi and A . Well , more or less . But wait , hold it , i was left with a night full of sorrow and hatred . Before i even go there , Mr IC ( IrritatinglyCute) , also from Sanziro , called me . And i was so damn fucking happy . Which turns my hatred into love again . Somebody shoot me . Well , apart from that , I was sad thruout . And I hated that our talk didnt last for long . Someone confessed to me of what they did , and i felt so betrayed . Making love on his bed ? His my brother ! Yes , i must admit it's his fault . But it was yours too . It's your body and so , you have the right . Don't tell me you're forced or whatsoever . And oh Brother , yknw you hurt me . I still have yet to talk to you about this yknw . And I don't think you have any idea that i know about this . Oh come on , what are you doing ? You left me crying and thinking about this till this fucking minute so thanks for messing up my life . Why dek ? Why ? I hugged , kissed that body of yours without knowing what you did before . I hate you dek . I really do . :'( You got me all fired up to the extend where i swore i would beat you up the moment i saw you . you are my everything . ASAL ADEK BUAT KAKAK MCM GYNI ?! You swore you won't do anything stupid . You swore you'll be a good guy . Adek , Im disappointed . :'( Words just won't explain it all how much i love and care for you . And dont you fucking make me lose trust on you . Im fucking pissed off , SERIOUSLY . Please dek . She's not worth . Well and because of that , I slept at 2 and woke up at 4 and even thata fucking 2 hours of sleep wasn't a fucking peaceful one . Damn It .  Throughout the whole day , Ibu and the rest teased me and him . How shall i describe this scene ? Bear with me . He was sitting on the sofa and the back part of the room with the rest . Me and Halreyna was sitting at the front watching Bohsia . Ibu blurted out saying he wants my number . Padehal2 . We have been contacting for a week already , no make that 2 . And the teasing went on and on . and on . and on . lasted for 2 fucking hours . Ibu sang songs . He was laughing . He blushed . He smiled . So was I . What was he trying to convey ? Ibu was saying all kinds of things . Which has links to a perfect couple = me , him . NO that's not all . There was soooo many things that Ibu said . I wish they were all true . I remembered one of the songs that Ibu sang . " Menjeling menjeling, ku bertentang , maata kita sama memandang . " He blushed . Aku lagy blushed . We had this 'talkshow' everyone there was interviewed by Ibu . Ibu asked him about me . Well , I should really really forget him . And till now ? Sigh . He's not playing this week . DB . Sadsad . :'( I guess i shant attend the match . BAH . ! During th e'talkshow' was otp with KhaiJepon. We had a heart to heart talk . We almost expressed out everything and almost anything . And to the extend I was hurt by every single member of the LB's action , and I cried . That's when i went out of Ibu's house and everyone was puzzled at that moment as to why I cried . KJ knows . He comforted me . Thanks bro . I love you  Look , where were you people when i needed you the most ? KORANG ADE MASALAH , KORANC CARI AKU . AKU TAKDE PON NAK BANYAK BUNYI , AKU AT LEAST TOLONG KASI ADVICE ATAU PUJUK KORANG . BILE PART MASALAH AKU , KORANG CAKAP APE ?! Oh , itu masalah kau , noone of my concern . Tuh kau peh pasal . Eh Sasuay lah prangai . Eh sial , aku sedih lah . Abeh slame ni , aku ade ngan korang buat pe? Ade masalah cari aku , takde belah . Sudahlah . NAK KATE AKU DAH BERUBAH ? Pandang diri sendiri dulu , baru kau buley bebual ngan aku , siape dah berubah .Okay ? Mau bebual world , biar jalan . Takmo cakap tak gune , tembak tak kene , sui ? Beh , bile aku kate, die mau rapat ngan aku , kau kate ape? Biar laa . So , isn't it fair if i said the same too ? You might go on saying i've changed , now who has changed the MOST ? Answer that . Bukan nak gaduh , but , uh nevermind , korang TAK AKAN paham . It's okay , there's no use talking about this cause trust me NOTHING'S GONNA CHANGED . They won't change . They won't realise . Let ME be the one whom people are swearing on , cursing on , blaming on , when the problem lies on others . I told you im ajinx . UNAPPRECIATED . Thanks alot lah eyy. So in this game , im the villain . Huh ? You changed , they BLAMED ME ! Friendships broken , they blame ME . So , senang cakap , naqmu ade ape ape ngan aku ah ? Since aku bawak sial dalam hidup semua . And , im saying this to everyone not only LB . Sigh . :'( Foolish of me , but shits happened . And i have to live with it . No matter how shitty i feel when it comes to terms with me dealing with shittycraps . Well , i don't care . Here's the thing , I'm in going on a journey of life on boat . Who wanna come aboard with me ? So today celebrated Kak Nurul's birthday , He wasn't there . Name die pon start ngan A . Amacam ? He said : 1: Ur 'ish' ... especially when i disturbed about F.. HEHE ! Cuteness .... The only obstacle is , him . Hanya bayang-bayang wajah mu Sering bermain di ingatan Usahlah lagi engkau biarkan Ku pohon cinta suci mu |